Artex Monkey Global Warming in Barnsley

Alreight this weather in't it. Is this worrit's gunna bi like when t'global warmin kicks in? We'll bi alreight rarnd Barnsley cos wi gunna av a beach darn bi t'river Dearne. Bi champion that. They could allus dump a load er sand artside t'tarn hall an stick a few deckchairs up theear. Am up for that. Ad bi sat theer wi mi chip buttie an er pint or two. Av just bin up to t'Co-op, thev ad a special on Grolsch so a guess wi shud celebrate summet. Oops av just swallered mi chuddie wi mi lager. Bit gassy this. A think they call it Grolsch cos that's usually t'sound tha meks when thaz ad too many.

A hope it keeps warm forra bit longer. Else a'll av t'switch all my sockets en leets on an see if a can contribute sum mooer greenhouse gases. It'll save mi avvin ter buy thermals in t'winter. An bloody Royston Park'd luk a lot better. It's abart time t'council sewerted it art in't it. A wer nearly run ovver wi two bairns on scramblin motorbikes darn theer. Wi cud av one er them big greenhouses darn t'park, like in t'Eden Centre. Or build like one er them Angel er t'North things on t'top er Carlton muckstack. It'd mek a change from t'pylons ovver fields. Them things carn't bi gud for yer health can ther? Am full er good ideas me.

When t'wind's from south east an it's blowin sulphuric acid from cokin plant reight in t'middle er Royston then ar stop indooers. It wants shuttin darn that place a tell thi. It carn't bi doin us darn in Royston any good, ne'er mind what spin they try an purronit. Well at least wi t'flame flickerin a can find mi way ooam frum tarn when av missed mi last bus home.